вторник, 14 октября 2008 г.

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im a fucking failure.


got my first " FIRST TRUANCY�LETTER"
�in the mail last nigth.


WTF?
�ive never had detention or evern some what gotten in trouble.
i keep to myself
and dont act up

i get my tooth pulled every 2 weeks.
docotors appts att one point was once a week
random counselors meetings

why
today me and mom are meeting with my counselor to hopefullly figure out some ways to take a math class without killing myself over it.

my tooth is killing me
i had to take a coedine to sleep good last night

i woke up late again
first period is that math lass so my mom understand
but i hate myself for that


everyone speaks about how easy highschool was for them or is for them

but its a fucking struggle for me,.
most likely because i hate it so much id rather do anything then go.


i hate being treated like a child.
i hate the fact that my mom thinks shes gunna go to jail cus i miss school somtimes.


withtin the past 45-50 days of school
�ive missed 8 days most, only in some perios.

add up

1ortho appt every 2 weeks.

thats about 4

plus my tooth cleaning 3 weeks ago
�that 5

plus being sick 3 days give or take


�get off my fucking back

�i ucking hate school


�id be in ilc or adult ed in a hott minute real quick if i didnt want to walk with my class so bad.


fuck

my back is tense, my head is pounding,

�IS THERE� A SOLUTION.


one i can work with.

the happpiness in my life is slowly but surely fading away into whts obviously gona be a hard, cold, dark, lonely winter.
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